“For love to last, it is best not to have too many expectations. It is better just to offer love.” ~ His Holiness the Karmapa
Have you heard this before – “If you want to love another human being, you know you must start with yourself,” says Meggan Watterson and Lodro Rinzler, co-authors of a new book to be released September 15, 2015 titled How to Love Yourself (and Sometimes Other People) – Spiritual Advice for Modern Relationships.
The authors want us to ask ourselves, “Where has my love not yet reached? Invite your hard-to-reach stories in like a dinner guest.”
We hear over and over again that meditation is the key to becoming familiar with ourselves. This same theme rings true in How to Love Yourself (and Sometimes Other People).
Watterson and Rinzler believe the amount of time we reserve for actually being by ourselves, especially through meditation (in the present moment) has become less and less because of too many distractions. Their mantra is “the true search for love happens within.”
There is a three-step process the duo refers to in this book of loving yourself based on Buddha’s ability to teach others to present themselves more authentically. The three steps are:
1. Look at yourself
2. Discover your basic goodness
3. Develop faith in that goodness
You will learn from Meggan and Lodro about a process called Disciplined Hope.
At the end of each chapter, the authors provide their interpretation and direction on what they’ve discovered works for loving themselves and others through situations like:
– How to love dating
– How to love being single
– How to fall in love without losing yourself
– How to commit to love
– The suffering of suffering
– Love without attaching strict conditions and expectations
– The boundless potential for love
How to Love Yourself is filled with exercises, meditation opportunities and a new way of looking at love. The book is also filled with many wisdom teachings from poets, mystics and the gospels.
Bottom line, the message I walked away with is this:
“Be still and know that happiness in lasting relationships is to be willing to never betray your own needs over other’s needs. First, marry your own soul — the spiritual eye of the heart and all else will fall into place.”