Is This A Dream? When Will I Know, How Will I Know, When Will I Know Why?

I couldn’t have found a better song to describe my whirlwind last few years of transformation.  Not so much for the film the song was written for (Valley of the Dolls), but more for how my ego and emotions controlled a better part of my life.

A song by Dionne Warwick appeared one day on the radio and just began to speak to me.  It spoke to me about the journey I’ve been on and it touched me deeply.

If you aren’t a 1950s-1960s child, you may have never heard of this song.  I’m a 1950s baby and I really never paid much attention to the words to this song.  I vaguely remember the movie, but it wasn’t a movie that I would have identified with in the 60s.

Three decades of my life are a blur to me.  I was caught up in a merry-go-round with corporate America and rarely had time to enjoy the most precious time of my life, raising a family.  All too often, I had to work to bring home the bacon so my children would lead a different type of life – more prosperous and less stress.

I was a tough love mother who had them involved in every sport and activity; the best daycare that money could buy; drove them hard on academics and perfection.

Yes, my children are very successful, but I’ve lost that connection to them as a mother.  I never fostered the importance of a strong connection to family.  I never showed them or taught them how to never forget to respect our ancestors for who they were and what they gave us.

Today, I’m off that track and I couldn’t be happier.  That journey is over, but a new, more peaceful, prosperous ride is taking flight.  It’s a wonderful time, and I’m becoming much more satisfied to know and understand why I am here.  I’m happy with me and what I’ve created.  And, yes, I’m a good mother.

Listen to this deeply powerful song that speaks to me, and I hope speaks to you too.  It didn’t mean anything to me in 1968, but things have changed even though they have stayed the same in 2011.

And to the universe I say, “I’m glad to be off the merry-go-round.  I have a feeling I’m just entering a new phase of a very wonderful life.  I am blessed.  Thank you, thank you, thank you for giving me such a wonderful mother and father who I honor, appreciate and respect.”

Until tomorrow, I send you my blessings and wishes for a prosperous and abundant life!

A Theme From Valley of the Dolls – 1968

Gotta get off, gonna get
Have to get off from this ride
Gotta get hold, gonna get
Need to get hold of my pride

When did I get, where did I
How was I caught in this game
When will I know, where will I
How will I think of my name

When did I stop feeling sure, feeling safe
And start wondering why, wondering why
Is this a dream, am I here, where are you
What’s in back of the sky, why do we cry

Gotta get off, gonna get
Out of this merry-go-round
Gotta get off, gonna get
Need to get on where I’m bound

When did I get, where did I
Why am I lost as a lamb
When will I know, where will I
How will I learn who I am

Is this a dream, am I here, where are you
Tell me, when will I know, how will I know
When will I know why?

© Chris Waugh and Moment 2 Moment, 2011-2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Chris Waugh and Moment 2 Moment with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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One Response to Is This A Dream? When Will I Know, How Will I Know, When Will I Know Why?

  1. Accokeek football…

    […]Is This A Dream? When Will I Know, How Will I Know, When Will I Know Why? « Moment 2 Moment[…]…

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